I will try to reply as good as it get to your reaction
Please first read completely, if necessary twice, bofor you react.
Thanmx in advance
But I think what’s being discussed here is cultural
I agree, see my former writings, Ithink removing the option of showing you offer a shared bed, is no good as well.
People should know upfront what you offer (Altough host might change that once you are there).
You want it to be less “safe
No I want it to be more safe but realistic.
People with bad intentions, you do not avoid by adding, removing or censoring a text.
It needs something more But it does not need prejudging.
( I explain options lower in my text, but first read whats next
Your version of open mind being perhaps more relaxed than others
According me open mindness stands for:
Understanding all people, or at least try to. But no need to agree, still open to change your vision when it comes, no fingers pointing. Respoect anybody all the way. ALL the way.
I know it is not easy……
Meanwhile, there’s plenty of people in the world who are neither as mature or as comfortable with their bodies as you are.
I traveled more as 40 countries (NO hotels/ no restaurant, no couchsurfing: but sleeping and eatingh at and on the streets., I have been in prison, been homeless, been a professional military scout fighting in wars….
Trust me, I know.
This writting above is in no way ment to compare!
I just try to make clear that I was in positions to see people through all their emotions, in all cultures, in all circumstances…
When I hear certain sounds, trust me, I am far from feeling safe.
It is know as PTSS. But I try to adapt, I try to see visions, try to ground people(s) intentions.
I am careful, I listen, I do research……
Above all I act as an adul take my responsebillety before I even start to traver.
However as you might understand now. I know there are people (even over 50) that are far away from that point. ANDSadly enough there are people that had to act as an adult although they were only 8 years old!
For me this issue is not about policing either sexual or platonic interactions, its about the formation of a culture.
I know and I hope it is
One of the many problems with CS is it’s tacit open door policy to dating, nudity and weird sex stuff. Not that I have a problem with such things
To be honest: I do not wanna know the fact that you have no problem with weird sex stuff. Maybe it is too much info
I’m not an 18 year old woman heading out on my first adventures.
Couchers is for “certain” people…. But what certain?. Who fits in? Who is wise enough, who is mature enough? and who is not? Who decides? and who can decide?
People using websites like this, you must be at least 18 btw, should do some research first.
But here comes the trick. Lower educated, people, youngsters from over protecting families, Youth that want to escape…etc: They will not listen to what more experienced people tell them, no matter how you protect.
They have to find out the hard way, like with booze, drugs and relations.
Then how if they do mot listen, do you protect a webside ;like this.
How do you enter the mindset of people with bad intentions, without aiming for the innocent, the good fellow?
There is an opportunity here to build into the fabric of the Couchers community some simple filters that allow space for all, but basically stop the naive and vulnerable stepping into a situation where consent is already thrown out of the window.
The opportunity might be; People can only create a profile and sign in with a valid ID.
And even only enter with a valid ID.
Such technics are not everywhere available yet.
It takes time to get agreements with all officials that has to deal with this.
and in some areas, it would not work for other reasons.
Next to the fact that many people prefer to have their privacy.
Yes…. As well people who has nothing to hide.
But, when possible, and everybody agrees on this check, yes, that would be a big difference with the way it is done now. Most people think twice when their personal details are kept in a system that can be easily connected to the police/ government.
What??? Sharing info with the government?.
Baeeeh… I get a bad couchsurfing ( AirB&B) taste in my mouth, while writing this.
This is why I suggest leaving all things open, flexible and filterable. That way if people want to share a bed, for whatever reason, they still can
Nice, but was’t that what I was writing in my first reactions?
The fact that I showed my disagreement about blocking people/ profiles shared beds
Amsterdamned good host