I only left once a negative reference on Couchsurfing. A traveler asked for a couch and I offered a place during a free weekend of mine. We agreed to meet at the local station around a certain time.
I was there like 20min in advance, because I hate being late , after more than 2 hours waiting, and no message (not on email, not on the Couchsurfing website, not on my mobile: I always gave my number, never know when there is no internet to connect) I decided to head back home.
When I got back home I did send a message to this female traveler asking if everything was ok, maybe her plans had changed or she was in trouble with something and I could help out. No reply.
After 2 days I asked again, “He, you ok, we agreed to meet up, you didn’t show up. Everything ok, in any problem? Can I help?”
After 5 days still no answer I did see she signed on in a different town. I did send a new message asking how she was doing, and telling that a little warning her planes had changed would have been appreciated. She got angry with me for sending that message, saying she didn’t have to tell me anything. I told her, “Hey, I arranged my free time to host you, meet you at the station, and than you ghost me for several days. Not very polite is it?”. She did leave a negative review for me the next day. So I did the same, leaving a negative review.
I understand plans can and will change, sometimes last minute. But be a polite surfer and let the waiting host know than. If she would have send me a message I would have know she changed her plans and could have used the almost 3 hours I waited and the free weekend for other plans.